When I think about client care, I always come back to one simple question: What if this were my mom?
That’s not just a hypothetical for me. I’m close to my mom and she is also one of my clients. I often think about how I’d want someone to care for her if she was experiencing loss or grief. That mindset grounds the way I show up for clients: with patience, clarity and support. Grief is never easy, and no one should go through it alone.
Whether the loss was sudden or expected, stepping into life without your partner feels like entering unfamiliar territory. There’s emotional weight, of course, but also a lot of practical, financial decisions that need to be made. At TCI, our goal is to help make that transition as smooth as possible.
1. Start With Space
In the first days and weeks after losing a spouse, it’s easy to feel like you should be doing more. Calling this person. Cancelling that account. Submitting this document. The truth is many financial decisions can wait. The most important thing early on is creating room to breathe.
If we’re working together during this time, I always encourage clients to pause and focus on just a few urgent items:
- Gathering death certificates
- Making sure you have access to financial accounts
- Reviewing immediate bills or recurring payments
- Notifying Social Security, pension plans and insurance companies
Even this short list can feel overwhelming. It’s not about accomplishing everything at once; it’s about slow and steady progress. That’s why I provide my clients with a simple checklist tailored to what they need to accomplish. It helps prioritize what matters and in what order. At TCI, we go a step further: we pre-fill any paperwork needed to transfer accounts or claim benefits, so clients can focus their energy elsewhere.
Creating space to breathe isn’t a pause from the process, it’s part of it. With the right support, clarity comes more easily, and each step forward feels a little lighter.
2. Surround Yourself with a Trusted Team
One of the biggest advantages clients have during a time like this is a strong financial team. That includes your Advisor, but also a CPA, estate attorney, insurance professionals and sometimes even a long-term care specialist.
Each member plays a different role:
- Your TCI Advisor helps organize and prioritize financial decisions, like which accounts to draw from and what needs to be updated.
- Your CPA makes sure nothing is missed when it comes to survivor benefits, inheritance rules or final tax returns.
- Your estate attorney updates legal documents and helps transfer ownership on property or trusts.
- Your insurance team makes sure you understand what coverage continues and what changes.
Working with a team makes this process far less stressful. Your team is here to answer questions and wants to help you. It also ensures that things don’t slip through the cracks, especially when you’re trying to balance the emotional and logistical side of grief.
I once worked with a client whose husband passed away unexpectedly. She hadn’t met any of the other professionals he’d been working with. She called me not knowing who else to call or where their accounts were. I came in, connected her with her team and built a new relationship centered around her needs and her new reality. When something this challenging happens, collaboration matters.
3. Update What Reflects Your New Reality
Over time, the documents and details of your financial life need to reflect your new situation. This is where a lot of clients feel the paperwork fatigue starts to set in. Yet, it’s precisely at this point where they begin to take ownership of their next chapter.
Some of the key updates include:
- Reviewing and updating beneficiaries
- Revisiting wills and trusts
- Making sure powers of attorney and healthcare directives are current
- Retitling homes, vehicles and financial accounts
If you had a trust, for example, you may assume everything is covered. What many people don’t realize is that financial institutions won’t know to re-register accounts under a trust unless you specifically instruct them to. I’ve seen families assume the trust handled everything only to be surprised when accounts ended up in probate because they were never properly titled.
4. Rebuild the Plan for the Life You Want to Live
Eventually, we get to the part of planning that’s about more than logistics, it’s about intention.
Your life has changed. Your financial plan should, too.
Some clients find their household budget changes dramatically. Others want to adjust their investment strategy to be more conservative, or more income-focused. Some revisit long-term goals entirely, choosing to gift more to their children, travel more frequently or give back to causes that now carry deeper meaning.
As an Advisor it’s our job to help you define what your version of moving forward looks like and build a plan around that. Financial planning isn’t only about spreadsheets and returns, it’s about outlining how you want to live, making choices together to ensure it’s adequately funded and then living it.
5. Give Yourself Permission to Find Joy Again
Loss doesn’t disappear. It becomes a part of you, but that doesn’t mean you have to stay stuck in survival mode.
After a loss, I’ve seen clients take a trip they always dreamed of, start new family traditions, or pick up a hobby they hadn’t touched in years. I’ve seen others pour into charitable giving, volunteering or becoming a resource for others navigating loss.
These moments of joy aren’t a betrayal of your past; they’re a continuation of it. Honoring the life you shared, while choosing to keep living with purpose.
Planning can support that. It can give you the confidence to say yes to new opportunities, and the clarity to know that you’ll be okay.
Working with clients who have experienced loss is something I feel deeply connected to. The decisions made during this time are incredibly important, and people need space, clarity and patience to navigate them well.
Maybe it’s because I’ve seen what happens when someone is left unprepared. Or maybe it’s because I believe everyone deserves someone in their corner who sees them as more than a to-do list.
If you or someone you love is going through this kind of transition, my message is simple:You don’t have to figure it out alone. Let’s take it one step at a time. Together.
